Metacentricities

For some reason I can’t quite figure out, I’m a little obsessed by Ted Haggard. I read lots of news items and then blog posts about the whole situation. I’ve seen the videos of him, and Mike Jones. At odd times of the day I’ll think about what his life is like right now. I feel sad and feel compassion for what he is going through now as America’s current most famous fallen Christian. His life is a complete mess.

There are so many threads of thought that come to me from this whole situation. From his own life, both inner and outer, at this moment, and the life of his family. And, the issue of how progressives should see it. In the blogosphere, there has been plenty of gloating, talk about his hypocrisy. Plenty of compassionate wishes from progressive Christians, calls to not be judgmental.

On one hand, I struggle with saying that in order to find a way out of his pain, he needs to find a more open kind of faith - one that embraces different sexualities. He has his faith, he has his beliefs that he wants to live his life within. Who am I to suggest that he should find a new framework? Perhaps, somehow, within that, he’ll find some peace. But then it is this framework that has created so much pain for so many people, and continues to create pain for people.

And then I think about the political aspects. The ways that people like him (and him in particular) see themselves vis-á-vis people like me. I live an immoral, depraved life according to him. I don’t deserve equal rights, my partner and I (not that we necessarily want them, but …) can never have the rights of a heterosexual married couple according to him. Ted Haggard worked hard against what could be considered my best interests.

I imagine at some point, I’ll stop having these moments of wondering how Ted Haggard is feeling. But until then, I hope that he finds a way to some peace with himself, and who he is.

Technorati Tags: faith, God, tedhaggard

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